Thursday, 19 January 2017

Mind-Shift, No Longer An Addict...





A lot has been changing here since I last posted in September. Mind-shifting, life altering changes. Last summer was the most difficult period I've ever experienced, watching my daughter being eaten by an anxiety monster was horrendous. There were times I though I wasn't going to make it, but I did. Things have gotten easier, and my daughter has just started to access some specialist support.



During our lowest point, I did think that maybe I wouldn't make it, my heart would stop from the stress. Dramatic I know, but that's just how I felt. Some nights we never got any sleep. On the nights I did sleep, I wondered if I would wake up. I though about what would happen if I wasn't there, how my husband would cope caring for out two very complicated girls. I wrote a mental list of all those wonderful women I have in my life, and what roles they could take over, the parts they could play in helping my girls to become adults. I can't believe I'm writing this, but it's truly how I felt.



I also thought about our home, and how much stuff I had around me, it started to suffocate me, stress and stuff I now know, is not a healthy combination for me. All this happened around the same time I came across the book I mentioned in my last post, Simple Matters by Erin Boyle. She and her family live very simply, in a tiny apartment in New York. As I read the book, I started to understand what I needed to do, and I started to reach out to a new way, a simple way in which to live my life. I also came across more people living a simpler life, and sharing the benefits of their new lifestyle.





Since September, our home has undergone a transformation. Every room, cupboard, drawer has been decluttered. I've been ruthless, I've got rid of at least 60% of our stuff. Everyone has benefitted from this, not just myself. We now only have the things that we love on display, and we only have things that we use in our cupboards. A cellar that was full to the ceiling of stuff, now only has a few boxes of useful things. I've got rid of drawers and cupboards, because we no longer need them. We have lots more space now to breathe.



We not only have more space, but time too, cleaning and caring for our home takes a lot less time and energy now. Can you remember the Half Hour Allotment book that I used to change the way I gardened? Well I'm adopting the same principles in my home too, little focused chunks of cleaning and clearing. Very manageable. Not overwhelming. Brilliant.



Sorting through our stuff has also made us look at the way we shop, being mindful of how and why we might purchase something. We are looking also at the amount of waste we produce, and plasticwe consume. It's a whole new path we are on. I say we, it did start out as just me, but slowly my husband is joining in, the girls have been fantastic at letting go of stuff. They are finding the waste thing more difficult. Little steps, I'm trying to take things gently with them, after all they are genetically programmed to resist change. We are even changing what we eat, and loosing weight as a result.



So you could say I'm no longer a Vintage Sheet Addict. I've yet to clear out my studio, it's my last job to do, but you know, I no longer feel the need to hoard things. So I will keep enough fabric so I can do a few projects and the rest will go. None of this has been hard, even sentimental things, if it's not something I love, has gone. I've shed some tears as I've been sorting, but then I've let go. It's been very cathartic, liberating.



But now for something more difficult. Letting go of this blog. Vintage Sheet Addict is no longer relevant to my life, it doesn't reflect who I am anymore. I would love to share my new life with you, and I've tried my best to start a new blog, but no matter how hard I try, I've just not got the intelligence, or computer awareness to create a new one, everything fails. This post has taken ages, I'm not even sure this will publish.




It's very important to me that my blog reflects my life, and is visually pleasing to me. I can no longer access any of my new images, and I can't even set up a new blog through blogger. Every avenue I take has a block. I'm a big believer in fate, so perhaps it isn't the right time for me to blog anymore. I hope I can again one day, but it has to be simple and not stressful. That Blogsy App was fab, but no longer working ;)



So I say goodbye, and thank you for your friendship and support. I will keep trying, and if ever I do manage to set one up I will pop a link on here. I am still on Instagram but not as much as before. I'm
happy_little_plot should anyone wish to find me, I know not many of you use IG. I'm so glad I've been able to get back on here, one of my biggest regrets was not to say a proper goodbye, and let you that I was doing just fine.




Sending my love,




Amanda :) xxx

48 comments:

  1. Big hugs to you and your family.

    Julie xxxxxxx

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    1. Thank you Julie, I know you've visited me lots over the years, much love to you :) xxx

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  2. I've really enjoyed your blog, you have a lovely style, and I've loved seeing the progress of your garden in particular. Good luck with the less! It is something I've been trying slowly too xx

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    1. Thank you, less for me is certainly helping. I've loved making the garden easy to manage, thank you for your visits and support. Wishing you all good things :) xxx

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  3. I'm terribly sad to know you were struggling last year my lovely friend, so preoccupied was I with my own battle.

    Just know that I completely understand. Sometimes, sadly, you have to hit rock bottom before you are able to start climbing back up again. Wishing you every happiness on your upwards journey. Much love. xx

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    1. Bless you, I know you've had a really difficult time. I hope things are going well now and your new venture is helping in the process, sending much love :) xxx

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  4. I too have enjoyed visiting your blog. I'm going through a similar realignment in my life. It is both difficult and wonderful. I will check out the book you mention. Wishing you well. I'll hope for more writing from you and in the meanwhile, I'll follow your insta. Thanks for all the thoughtful posts. Be well!

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    1. Hi K, yes I really believe, if we are open to it, the right things appear at the right time. The book is great, she's on Instagram too, Reading My Tea Leaves. Hope things are on the up for you now :) xxx

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  5. So sorry you had such a rough year last year, but it seems that you are on the way up now. Decluttering is an amazing feeling isn't it. Well done on being so ruthless. Sometimes when I'm clearing a cupboard and I'm not sure about something I actually say "ruthless" to myself and get rid of it. I'm sad to see your blog go, but as you say, it is the right thing for you at the moment. If you ever start another you know I'll be there. Wishing you and your family every happiness for the future. Hugs, CJ xx

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    1. Thank you CJ, and thanks for all your visits here. I'd love to start another one day, just need a brain that can figure it all out! Sending my love :) xxx

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  6. Another person who has struggled with Blogger and the disappearance of the App supporting it. I have blogged about the difficulties I have had, I think I will be trying Wordpress, whilst leaving reminders of the new address on my present blog.

    By the way,as part of our decluttering I found our bedding in the same pattern as the backdrop to your blog. M & S circa 1974. I had pink, one housemate had purple and the other yellow, Marks was the place for bedding then.

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    1. I did try WordPress but messed it up so much it won't let me on now ;) the M&S pattern is fab isn't it :) xxx

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  7. I feel like I just got to know you a little bit last summer. I hope you feel so much better now in this new fase of your life. Bur also I hope someday you will be back with a new blog. I will find you on instagram and will follow you there in stead...
    Be happy,
    love,
    Mirjam

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    1. Hi Mirjam, things are easier now, the difficulties are still there but we are learning new ways to cope. Thank you for your support you've given me :) xxx

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  8. I'm so glad you are feeling less overwhelmed Amanda. I need to get on to put clutter and have a better control of our finances this year. I'm trying to have a no spend January (apart from food and household necessities). I'm also looking for better deals on insurances etc.
    There still a way to go but I am feeling more in control and that is good.
    I'll keep in touch on Instagram. I love to see your home and wonderful garden.
    Lots of Love
    Jacquie x

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    1. I'm thinking of doing a no spend February, food seems to be shooting up in price at the moment. I know you've visited lots here and you wiere a huge inspiration to me when I started my blog, thank you :) xxx

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  9. I'm missing you already . But i am so happy that you've found 'another you' .... I know just what you mean about all the blogy chit chat and 'new ways' . I think the same . It's all change . And change is good but jolly hard work sometimes ! Sending many hugs , the big wrap around ones that make you feel nice and cheery inside . Be well and happy ! Maria ( Rosey tinted of course ) xx

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    1. Hug feels goo Maria, I'm hugging you back! Thanks for all the love and support you've given me over the years and how you understood :) xxx

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  10. I've always so enjoyed your blog and hope you'll find one again when the time is right... I'm not very good with words but I'm here with you...

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  11. I guess you have to stay with what feels simple. It would be great to read more of the story somewhere! I hope a magic blogging fairy appears with a solution, if it is the right thing. A new blog one day would be fun right! :-) X

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    1. I wish she'd give me a hand Heather! Thanks for your never ending support :) xxx

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  12. I have missed reading your blog, you will be missed here in blogland. I hope the hardest parts are over for you and your family and you all go from strength to strength xx

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    1. I think there will always be the challenges, and that makes it all the more important to simplify what I can, wishing you well Cheryl :) xxx

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  13. I wish you well and really hope you will continue to blog.Much love.Barbarax

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    1. Thanks for all your visits Barbara, they are much appreciated:) xxx

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  14. As always do what is right for you at the time x

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  15. Oh gosh Amanda I will really miss you but completely understand. Hoping everything has settled down with your daughter, and wishing you much peace, love, and happiness xxxx

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    1. Things are more manageable now thank you Jill, take care :) xxx

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  16. I will miss your blogs though they are infrequent I always learn so much from them Do admire your decluttering maybe you could come and declutter me!
    Do hope your daughter is now feeling a lot better and able to manage things, teenagers go though so mnay hormonal changes.both my daughters are going though early menopause and that is a struggle but my granddaughter now 18 seems to be finally on a smooth path thank the Lord. Trust you will still be on instagram, not a big fan personally I prefer blogs as they tell us so much more.

    Take care of yourserlf Amands, wish you would use this blog space as your new blog I am sure that could work and keep us all in touch with you, sorry prattled

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    1. I know you've had your fair share of difficulties and yet you've always offered great support and advice, thank you Margaret and I hope life continues to improve for you :) xxx

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  17. Dear Amanda, I'm so glad for you that you seem to have come out the other side. I know that feeling, and I can remember being astonished eventually to realise that even though it had been very painful being there, I learnt so much and changed so much that I valued the experience despite the pain. For me it also meant that when I later found myself moving back in that direction, I was able to use what I had learnt before to avoid the worst, and to protect and nurture myself.
    I wish that for you, and for your daughter too - seeing her pain must have been just the worst most scary thing for you all.
    I've really enjoyed visiting you here, and I will miss you, but I'm glad that you've now moved on and I wish you all the very best to come.

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  18. Well done you on the clearing out, it is so freeing isn't it!! Sorry to see your blog go, I do follow you on IG as I am sure you know so I will see you there. For everything there is a season and perhaps it is time for a new season for you. All the best whatever you do and wherever you go!

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    1. Thanks Any, it's quite liberating! Thank you for all you support too :) xxx

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  19. I have not been blogging for the past couple of weeks for various reasons. But just yesterday I started thinking of all my blogging friends and how I missed reading what was happening in their lives, and I was for some reason thinking about you. I wondered how you were doing, and what you might be up to, and tonight I read this poignant post. I'm sorry to hear you've had a very difficult time with your sweet girls. Life sure can be stressful at times. You think as your kids get older, the easier things will become, but really it just opens up a whole different set of problems that make us all anxious and worried. You have more than your share of life changes and challenges, and I applaud you for fighting through them each day.
    Good for you in clearing out your house! I did the same thing last spring and it was such a challenge but also a great benefit. I do feel that more is required though even after one year. It does make you feel great about your space again, doesn't it. Good luck with your continued life changes Amanda (I'm going to look up that book). Although I have missed popping in to catch up with you, I completely understand how things change and blogging can take a lot of time. Sending you big hugs and a few prayers as well my friend (my first follower!!),
    Wendy xox

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    1. Hi Wendy, I never realised I had been your first follower, I will pop by again and see you, once I have more time...this simplifying stuff is taking up my time! :) xxx

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  20. Dear Amanda. You have written the post I should be writing myself. I'm not stopping blogging, but everything else - I have been needing to declutter for years - I usually joke about it but ut isn't really funny. My latest hexagon quilt (work in progress) is testament to the fact I realised there was no point hoarding all this fabric for a 'special' quilt it would never happen. So I cut into the very precious stuff… which will help me get rid of some of the rat of it. My home has become more cluttered since retiring. And it is hard, hard hard bringing oneself to get rid of stuff when there is an affectionate bond with it. I am taking stock this weekend. I need to come at it from an oblique angle! So thank you for being so open. I really will miss you. Lynne xxxxx

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    1. Hi Lynne, I'm glad you're still blogging, I will pop over soon...yes why save the fabric, use and enjoy! Thank you for all the love and support you've shown me over the years :) xxx

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  21. Goodbye and good luck!!!! I always felt and affinity with you, my mum has Alzheimer's and reading about your experiences helped me to feel less alone with my struggles. Will follow you on Instagram. xxxx

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    1. It's a very difficult illness to watch, the person you loved disappears but that doesn't mean the love does, their or yours :) xxx

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  22. Good Morning Amanda. I have thought of you often over the months and hoped things will sort out. My daughter mentioned she had seen posts on Instagram so I knew life was ticking over for you. I do hope you find your inner peace and all goes well with the future plans for you and your family. As many have already said I will miss reading your posts but understand your reasoning for closing here. All the very best, enjoy your garden.

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    1. Hello Alison, yes a new chapter has started for me, in lots of respects. Life continually changes and we just have to learn to adapt and change with it! :) xxx

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  23. Thanks for all that you have shared with us and I envy you and your family in the decluttering process. I'm overwhelmed with all the fabric and art items that I have. Maybe I'll work more on it again. I just started following you on Instagram as I love your garden and hope you'll continue to let us peek at all that you are planting and doing. I'm glad things are better!!

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    1. Hi Judy, just start on shelf at a time ;) xxx

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  24. Goodbye, and thank you again. I'll miss your blog, but that's more than made up for by hearing that your life has moved on in a good way. I hope that things are going well for you, and especially also for your daughter. I agree with you wholeheartedly, that those little steps are so important - both in themselves, and for what they add up to.
    My kindest wishes, Deborah

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    1. Life is good, it's still a real challenge and just this week we've had another family challenge to get our heads around. Never boring and never predictable. Thank you for your support :) xxx

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